Maria Konnikova is many things, one being an author. She is very experienced in life and has a lot of wise things to say like in, “The Limits of Friendship”. It is important to get to know a little about the author before reading to learn some insight to what kind of life the author has had. It possibly provides some insight into what you may be reading.
I have found that my life before social media was full of security, confidence, and pure happiness with the world I was surrounded by. That was until I saw what the media expects me to look like and how to act. It has helped me stay in contact with some distant friends but it doesn’t feel the same as being able to look them in the eye and watch them smile over a joke you just made. The connection between two people who barely know each other but see each other all the time will always be stronger than the connection between two people who have known each other forever but rarely see each other.
The Dunbar number is basically a variety of numbers that represent groups of friends with different relationships, ranging from close friends to simply just acquaintances. The rule of three explains how our relationships can be perceived through multiples of three. Konnikova states, “While the group sizes are relatively stable, their composition can be fluid. Your five today may not be your five next week; people drift among layers and sometimes fall out of them altogether.” Implying that even though friends come and go you will always be able to place them into a group of closeness.
In my opinion, the key to maintaining a meaningful friendship or really just any relationship is mutual happiness. Valuable memories that will last a lifetime. Much like Konnikova explained, shared experience is what keeps the relationship so strong. The thought of knowing someone who is going through the same thing is comforting. Laughing about the same thing at different times with someone doesn’t have the same impact as laughing with someone side by side. It’s a bonding experience. If you are raised thinking that virtual interactions are the same as physical interactions it can establish social skill issues. Such as not understanding the significance of hugging loved ones.
Social media may be helpful in finding people who can relate to what you may be doing in school. Finding people who can relate could help better your understanding if you are struggling. On the other hand, life online can take over our minds completely. So you must be careful in how you use it. It puts the idea in our heads that we aren’t who we are supposed to be. We need to “be better”. Getting too caught up in social media will cause a decline in mental health. Therefore, a decline in our academic performance. Personally, I don’t see any true benefit in social media that something in the real world couldn’t already do for us. Social media is just a distraction to shift our focus away from dealing with the real world.
